Autobiography: A ruined life? Not!

Dorothy was certainly not happy about the pregnancy; but it did not in any way ruin her life. She was a happy teenager who loved to dance and who was that cute redhead with a talent for making males feel good about themselves. Without a doubt, pregnancy did not mean her options concerning marriage were suddenly limited. Her mind wasn’t on such opportunities but they popped up without warning.

Walton’s best friend proposed marriage to Dorothy when he learned Walton was trying to wiggle out of responsibility for the pregnancy. Dorothy declined that proposal as she declined another proposal when recuperating from my birth. She had earlier declined the doctor’s offer to perform an illegal abortion; he was a friend of the Deerfields. She told me, “I didn’t want to add another mistake to the one I had already made.” Not that the women in the family would have allowed her to say “Yes” to an abortion. Babies were precious to them.

I was reminded of Dorothy’s position when I learned much later in life in an Anthropology class that some groups value a young woman who, in becoming pregnant, becomes more valuable as a potential bride with her proven ability to reproduce.

When I was 11 months old, Blanche, Brownie, Dorothy and I moved to Portsmouth, Ohio, where Brownie took a job driving a Pure Oil gasoline tank truck. Dorothy announced in Williamson, “I’m going to Portsmouth and find a husband!” And she did. She married Carroll Edwin Pyles 11 months later.

As for me, I probably made men feel good about themselves; however it was not from natural kindness, which I may have had, but because I came of age thinking of men as weak with fragile egos. I feared I might break one of those egos if I were to be harsh or unkind.

I received unexpected proposals from ten different men between 17 and 22. Unlike Dorothy, I was not eager to marry, would have preferred waiting until about 25. I wanted to have children and couldn’t figure out a way to do that without a man to provide a home for them. And a male presence, which I felt children needed. I loved Brownie deeply. He was a good man when he wasn’t drinking. Blanche was my stability. She was a strong woman who kept Brownie in line when he was drunk. Dorothy said Brownie was afraid of Blanche. Dorothy also told me Blanche had shot Brownie once because of jealousy. Blanche had then nursed him back to health. As far as Dorothy knew, the bullet was still in Brownie’s shoulder. So, he had good reason to fear Blanche. I never thought of Blanche as a violent woman.